So when I ask… are you keeping yourself from exploring gender… what I’m referring to is the mind-based, and fear-dominated response to life that says… No! I am not going to explore… No! I’m not going express my creativity… No! I’m not going to speak my truth.
Why? Well, because of all the terrible things that could happen… thats why! And in order to prevent those things from happening… I need to protect myself from feeling exposed.
And instead of giving in to the evolutionary impulse, which is leading me in the direction of a gender exploration… I’m going to hold myself back. Simply because moving forward is too scary.
And I’ve got a long list of hypothetical, future-based situations that justify that decision. Because this might go wrong. And that might go wrong. And that person might leave me. And that person might reject me. And i’ll never pass. And I’ll never find love. And people will make fun of me. And on and on and on.
And instead of making a decision that arises out of the intuitive wisdom of my heart… and grounding into the present moment… I default to a fear-based conclusion about life… which assumes that my failure is imminent. And I make decisions in order to protect myself from an imagined future-based reality that is looming over me like a dark cloud.
So in general… that’s the internal process which I’m referring to when I ask… are you holding yourself back? What I’m trying to point to is the unbalanced, fear-based, ungrounded mental process which disconnects us from our inner resourcefulness and causes us to feel totally out of control.
And now… instead of feeling hopeful and excited about a gender exploration. We feel pessimistic and anxious. And instead of feeling spacious and grateful… we feel claustrophobic and paranoid.
Why? Because like I said, our fears about what could go wrong are overpowering our sincere desire for growth. Which is causing us to feel torn between two perspectives. One that is asking us to take a leap of faith… and the other which is too afraid to let go.
So what do we do in this kind of a situation? How do we simultaneously address the feelings of fear and constriction, while also positioning ourselves in a way where we are honoring the creative unfolding of our soul?
Well thats what our strategy is all about. Re-discovering your inherent capacity to make decisions which evolve out of an intuitive, wholistic relationship with life. And learning how to generate an intuitive, emotional, and energetic response to your life path, which arises out of an intrinsic trust in this world… and a fundamental recognition that you belong.
Okay let’s get into the strategy… which is called Relax, and Be Okay NOW
This means trusting that your gender exploration is going to happen naturally and organically. And recognizing that you don’t ever need to force something that is authentic to you. Just like how a flower doesn’t force its’ pedals to open. And a bird doesn’t doubt its capacity to fly.
And in the same way… if this path is your destiny… and if exploring gender is your truth… then your job is less about making it happen, and more about giving into the process. And allowing for the natural flow of things to unfold naturally.
Which is a whole lot easier than trying to figure everything out, if you ask me.
So a much better use of your mental and emotional energies… is to focus on your day to day life. And to shift the emphasis of your gender exploration away from a moment in the future… and towards feeling better now. And instead of obsessing about how things are going to turn out… and debating if you are ready or not… or if you are capable enough… just have a good day.
Put your phone down. Go on a walk. Be kind to yourself. And do all the things that you need to do in order to feel more balanced and resourceful today. And see if you can pull back from the emotionally-draining, anxiety-producing and fear-generating process… which is your gender exploration. And just get back to the basics.
This means creating better habits. Establishing a routine. Taking care of your body. Replenishing your soul. Expressing your creativity. Engaging in meaningful conversation. Surrounding yourself with positive influences. Cultivating a balanced inner environment. And doing whatever needs to be done… so that you can be okay now.
Because in my experience… when I’m busy running around, trying to control the process, or protect myself from failure… what ends up happening is that I block out the very thing I’m trying to attract. Which is clarity. And resourcefulness. And if I don’t feel clear… and I’m stressed, and depleted… What do I do? Well I hold myself back. Not just from a gender exploration. But from everything. I constrict, and I tense. And I keep myself from moving forward, on all fronts.
And in contrast… I’ve also noticed that when I’m living a grounded, balanced, and connected life. And I’ve placed my emphasis on being okay now… things seem to naturally work themselves out. And clarity and resourcefulness show up right when I need them.
So my suggestion with this strategy is to pull back just a bit, and relax into a state of allowing. And instead of obsessing over a gender exploration… use your time and attention to nourish your body. And connect to the earth. And take care of yourself.
And see if you can start introducing more enriching, uplifting activities into your life. Such as walks in nature, and baths, and yoga, and mediation, and creative projects, and healthy foods.
And recognize that more important than having the exact kind of gender exploration that you think you’re supposed to have… is getting all your meals in today. And limiting your exposure to social media. And cleaning your space. And getting to bed at a good time.
And see if you can shift the emphasis of your life away from being in control… and towards cultivating a stronger relationship with authentic creative expression. And see if you can restructure the foundation of your life… in order to more fully support you in being truthfully you. Regardless of what that has to do with a gender exploration.
And if you can really focus your energies on being okay now… then my sense is all gender related decisions are going to happen naturally and organically.
And if you want to learn more about exploring gender from a balanced and open hearted position… then you should watch this video. Because in it, I share a simply strategy that will help you to connect to your intuitive guidance system, and inner resourcefulness.
Alright my friend. Thats all ive got in this one. Thanks for sticking with me to the end. Ill see you soon.